Evening Horses

Evening horses = night mares. First day of school nightmares suck. I’ve had 5 already this summer, all within the last few weeks. I hear that it’s pretty common for teachers to have nightmares in the month or so leading up to the first day of school. Good grief! This is the most I’ve had in my 3 summers of being a teacher for sure!

I thought this would be a fun post to look back on someday. So if you aren’t interested in hearing about my nightmares, you can move on. But perhaps a chuckle or two is in store for you if you read further about these “worst nightmare” experiences I’ve only experienced in my nightmares. Thank heaven.

1. I don’t remember it, other than I know it happened. And it sucked.

2. In this dream, our class is going on a field trip on the first day of school. So we start getting packed up, and suddenly, the kids start running around wildly, out of control. They tear out of the classroom, and start for the playground, all the while I’m running to try and catch up with them (and do what? I can’t say I know). They are all flying around outside as I approach the recess door, and then I realize that I forgot my badge in the room. I open the door, but I can’t go anywhere because if I shut the door, I’ll be locked out forever. And if I go back to the classroom, the children will be out of control and unmanned for much too long! Heavens to mergatroid! The end.

3. On the first day of school, I’m trying to explain the procedures of the class. As I’m explaining how to get up to go to the bathroom,  the routines of switching classes, etc, suddenly, my class becomes quite beastly. They will not stop talking, and they are talking REALLY loud! So naturally, I try and think of what to do. What do I do? I decide to ask the students different ways that their past teachers have made them be quiet. Good one Shauna, real nice. Then I decide that I will tell the class whenever they hear me say “Shoop,” they should shut their pie holes. Somehow, I don’t think 6th graders will be okay with this. The end.

4. It’s the morning of the first day of school. Of course, I would wake up late on the first day of school, right? (I suppose that’s a real fear of mine in general.) I start quickly looking for the perfect first day of school outfit, trying on oodles of clothing and just absolutely destroying my closet (any teacher knows to pick out their first day of school outfit the night before to avoid a problem like this). Everything I try on just won’t do, and time is ticking away. I never end up finding the perfect outfit, and of course I never really get to school on the first day. Not good, teach… The end.

5. I just “remodeled” my room this summer, because I switched grade levels from 4th to 6th. I’ll have the same kids I had in my first year of teaching, yippee! Anyway, I have worked pretty extensively this summer to make my room look as different as possible so those poor 6th graders won’t come back and feel a blast from the past coming on. That’s the realism part in this dream. So in my dream, the first day of school comes, and I get to school (on time in this particular one, bravo) and I have that nervous energy that anyone feels on the first day of any school year. I’m excited to open the door for my students to come swarming in, jollying about what a lovely room they will be residing in for their last year in elementary school.  The bell rings. They come all right. Students and parents alike come, the doors swinging open like floodgates as they they pour into the classroom. To my horror, they begin tearing everything off the walls! Crash! Pow! Bang! Parents! How dare you?! I wasn’t sure how to react, so I decided to wake up. The end.

It’s so strange that I have these recurring dreams, because to be honest, the first days of school are some the most fun of the whole year! Kids are usually still asleep from summer, they aren’t sure of the classroom dynamic yet so they are fairly quiet. The “out of control” portion of most of these dreams is actually quite unrealistic for the first day.

Bring it on August 18! (at least so these evening horses will subside!)

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